Avian Disapproval Rating

Bird Poops On President: <http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalradar/2007/05/bush_in_line_of_1.html>
Even the birds know Boosh sucks. The story doesn't mention this, but the secret service shot it seconds afterward.. Cheney tried to shoot it, but instead somehow shot David Gregory of NBC in the face... Indeed, perhaps this is a sign that things are looking up for our commander-guy.. {FARRRT}{SPLAATT!} "Hey, y'all, my dog just took a huge dump on my shoes, must be another sign of good luck, heh heh heh....yeppppp....."

Ron Paul Clubbed Unconscious By Other 9 Republican Candidates

Well, not really. But, I think they all wanted to. But Sen.Paul actually didn't repeat the same old lies the other lock-step Republicans did.. He actually explained the truth (albeit in an awkward, not-entirely-correct way) why we were attacked by jihadists and why Islam fundamentalists hate us. But of course the other candidates bent over backwards to berate him for such a "foolish" statement. Rudy Boy stepped in and wrapped his Mayor Of 9/11 cape around his shoulders and told Paul to apologize. "They attacked us because they hate our freedom." Yep, whatever. If you still really believe that, as well as all other GOP candidates, stay tuned for another collossally bad president, if one of the Country Club 10 is elected. (Actually, it will probably be pared down to 9 by then end of the week after Senator Paul is sent to Gitmo for "thought re-assignment".)

What? They're still here?

Paul Wolfowitz, Alberto Gonzales, Dick Cheney, George W. Bush: WTF? Who do you have to kill to get fired around here? Sheesh.

debate?

Hey I heard the Dems had a debate tonite.. if you can call a series of pre-written, staged questions aimed at each candidate, with little chance for rebuttal, a debate... ANyway, blah blah blah blah blah who cares blah blah no one reads this anyway blah blah blah blahh blhh#)(%#)($#df;gd

Rush Limbaugh - Parade Float

Here's a little tiny bit of a transcript from the windbag's website, read at your own peril:
"RUSH: We'd have to put the sun out to get rid of ozone, and that can't happen. " Mmm hmm. He's all about protesting those "liberals" bent on showing us the "facts" on "global warming".. He thinks Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" is "propaganda" just because he uses a computer graphic of a polar bear on melting ice. He actually doesn't believe polar bears are becoming endangered, despite the massive evidence. God help us, why is this fat asshole so popular? He's a total idiot. Someone please pull the plug on this jackoff before our country is dumbed down lower than the mind of an ADD-addled first-grader.

MSM Screws It Up Again

Main Stream Media can't get enuff of the latest tragedy, the mass shooting in Virginia. MSNBC.com has the killer's pic front and center on their website, so does CNN, and I imagine FoxNews, if I even cared to check. The last 3 news shows on MSNBC devoted exclusively to the tragedy (et tu, Keith?), and I would guess the current one is, too. Certainly a horrible, newsworthy event. But they're DOING IT AGAIN. Exploiting tragedy for ratings, at the expense of the victims and families and friends. In addition, I'm almost certain other news is happening, somewhere.. Maybe they'll break in with some urgent news, such as "Anna Nicole - Still Dead"... stupid monkeys...

Narcoleptic gardening implements

I found this little gem on the Internets.. I am reserving judgement. Perhaps it's a cry for help. I have to admit I liked the part about the "Hens". I'm sure he's not serious. (Inevitable Disclaimer: I am not a misogynist or racist, nor do I condone either. )

http://nappyheadedhos.blogstream.com/

Get Your Imus-Free Posts Here!

Yes, indeed, this may be the only blogsite that doesn't mention, er, uh, that dude on TV that said the bad thing... Let's move on, people.. There's no shortage of things for the media to talk about, what with that whole Iraq thing, perhaps that whole Iran thing, the U.S. attorney general's lying, the secret email system for the Republicans, the U.S. attorney firings scandal, the polar ice caps about to implode under the rising temps... Is it me? Or is it them? It's them, isn't it?!

Kermie & Dick

This is my personal video of the week. Oh, Lord is this good stuff. Especially if you're familiar with the Nine Inch Nails (or Johnny Cash) song, "Hurt". http://www.sadkermit.com/video.html Remember, it's only a stuffed frog. Also, you may want to check out Our Boy Dick's impression of a stalker in this little number..http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2007/04/03/cheney-lurks-behind-shrub_n_44924.html (play the YouTube clip.) Was little Dickie lost, or was he just controlling Boosh with a remote? Discuss!

The Roaming Gnome Is Gay

There, I've outed him. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It just seems obvious. Who's he kidding? Maybe it's just that outrageous British accent. In any case, Peace, Tolerance, and Freedom of Speech.

Anyone see the picture of the chocolate Jesus? I did, it's on www.huffingtonpost.com and probably elsewhere. Of course,it has offended Catholics, Christians, etc. I can understand that. But I believe in freedom of speech and I think there is a place for every person's opinion. That is (supposedly) why we go to war, to protect these freedoms. Throughout history, art has offended as well as uplifted. But let's look at the symbolism here - a chocolate Jesus, just before Easter. Remember, for most of us, Easter = Chocolate. Chocolate bunnies, chocolate eggs, etc. So what better medium to show Jesus, on Easter, then chocolate? Maybe it will be a reminder of what we really are supposed to think about at this time of year rather than down 3 pounds of chocolate. (No offense to chocolate-lovers - I love it too.) I am a Catholic, by the way. Technically, at least. I just don't agree with the radical right-wing nutcases like William Donohue who are the mirror image of radical Muslims. This is America- we have the freedom to show a chocolate Jesus and the freedom to disagree with it.

Hey friends, check out the Sports forum on Fish4Tips.Com. (www.fish4tips.com) I left a wager on when Alberto Gonzales will be forced to resign or die mysteriously in a kiln accident. I am leaning toward April 6. Place your bets now. If you win you get all the PayPal money in the pot. You might be able to buy enough sedatives to ride out the rest of the Bush era.

With a beard, and turned negative, I look somewhat like Wolf Blitzer from CNN. I think I'm going to shave.

Who Is Your Celebrity Look-alike?

Here's a kind of neat little thing to do on the Internets... http://www.myheritage.com/FP/Company/tryFaceRecognition.php You can post a photo of yourself or anyone and then run it throught their face recognition machine and it will tell you what celebrities match. I posted the photo of myself that's on this website and, hey, what a surprise, it matched me to David Schwimmer. (sigh.) Also had some additional matches which seemed odd - Arnold Schwarzenegger, and, strangely, Margaret Cho. Personally I don't see the similarity with any of these, but my friend Jeff (www.fish4tips.com) slapped the Tim/Ross pic together because he just KNEW.. Whatever... Could have been worse I guess. I could have matched Dick Cheney...

Chimpy Plays Hard To Get

Well, now our beloved president is refusing to allow his employees (Rove, etc.) to be subpoenaed http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17702224/ .. An excerpt: "Bush said his White House counsel, Fred Fielding, told lawmakers they could interview presidential counselor Karl Rove, former White House Counsel Harriet Miers and their deputies — but only on the president’s terms: in private, 'without the need for an oath' and without a transcript."

How arrogant can you get? George, this isn't 2005 anymore- the Congress is finally waking up. They are not going to accept your half-hearted offers. They are not going to accept what you say at face value anymore. No oath, no transcripts? This is just how out-of-touch and arrogant the White House has been from the get-go. They believe they are not answerable to the Congress or the American public. I hope the Congress continues their growth of a backbone, and hope the press starts doing their job and asking some important questions and keeping these stories in the news. Let's not go all ga-ga on the latest celebrity re-hab story again. K?

Bong Hits 4 Jesus featuring Kenny Starr!

Here's a brief excerpt from MSNBC.com (see link to complete story.)

Former independent counsel Kenneth Starr, whose Kirkland and Ellis law firm is representing Morse for free, argued that the justices should defer to the judgment of the principal. Morse reasonably interpreted the banner as a pro-drug message, despite what Frederick intended, Starr said.
School officials are perfectly within their rights to curtail student speech that advocates drug use, he said. “The message here is, in fact, critical,” Starr said.

Starr, joined by the Bush administration, also asked the court to adopt a broad rule that could essentially give public schools the right to clamp down on any speech with which they disagree. That argument did not appear to have widespread support among the justices.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17687386/

Well, thank God for the justices that want justice and not just blindly follow the Bush doctrine (see Gonzales, Alberto).

Hi, I'm Kenny Starr! You may remember me from such impeachment trials as "Bubba And The Case of the Missing Cigar"

New justices scorecard:

Alito seems to be his own man and is against the limitation of free speech, but the other newbie, John Roberts, seems to think the schools should teach us to just say no. To free speech, that is.

Why Does Bush Still Have A Job?

Can anyone answer that? Let me see..

Atty General in trouble over US Attorney firings, directed by White House
FBI illegally wiretapping U.S. citizens
Habeas Corpus suspended
Torture OK'd by Attorney Gonzales
Abu Ghraib
Guantanamo holding enemy combatants without trial
Secret torture bases in Europe
Walter Reed
Hurricane Katrina
Appointed best friend Harriet Meier for Supreme Court
"Heckuva job, Brownie"
Convicted felon Scooter Libby fall-guy for Rove and Cheney
Cut money from budget for veterans
And of course.. Iraq.

I'm just asking. Someone tell me. Why is impeachment "off the table"?

Worst. President. Ever.

Not Much To Read Here

Mouth still hurts. Too painful to type. The horror. The horror... Must not be taking enough happy pills. I'm sure Grampa Painless (http://fntnyl.blogspot.com/2007/02/hello-and-welcome.html) can tell me what I'm doing wrong. Did I take the blue one instead of the white one? So many questions. I was going to write about the dozen or so current scandals involving the White House, but that would take waaay too much time, and Timmy needs to lie down. Adios!

Yo

Mouth hurts.. throbbing.. hope it heals soon.. going to get the packing and stitches off tomorrow.. can't really eat solid food... an unopened bag of Doritos mocks me... Going to pop a pill and go to bed.. tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya, tomorrow. You're only a day away. yeah, lot of good that does me now..

Annoying Ad Music

Ah those crappy commercials. They've almost driven me from watching television. Almost.. I can survive though by muting them if I've got the remote handy. What is most annoying: Hmm I 'd say it's Vonage and their "woo-hoo-hoo" theme song. I seem to be in the small minority who doesn't think these are impossibly cute. Not sure why. OK then, how about that Mellencamp song "This is our country" which played at EVERY FREAKING COMMERCIAL BREAK on NFL games and other shows.. I don't hear it much anymore, but it was omnipresent at the time. I even like the man, but that song sucked and the images of Rosa Parks, MLK and others used to SELL CARS was a bit offensive to me. Alright then, what's with all this MARIMBA music in ads? Is it just me or does every insurance and financial product ad have to have marimbas in the background? They're not irritating, per se, but when it seems like everyone is doing it, it is. Now then, how about that awful theme song for Fox Sports NFL broadcasts? Oh, you know, the one that sounds like "Winter Wonderland" the first few notes and then goes into a squealing guitar (not GOOD squealing, BAD squealing) and inflames every sysnapse in your brain while it's on.. Or perhaps it's just me. Lastly, this isn't a Bad Music item, but I have to give a special shout-out for bad ads to my boy, the Movie Trailer Voice Guy. I've always wondered if there's more than one but it always starts out as "In a world..." He sounds like he's had a bad plate of clams and is about to rolf. I'm not sure why he can't just talk normal. Anyway thats it for now. Adios until we meet again, same blog time same blog channel.

Uncomfortably Numb (And Bleeding)

Yes, old Timmy had some dental surgery today. Something involving thin gums or some such nonsense. It was a little thing they had to correct from my last painful appointment. Anyway I was told it was important so I went in. I actually was thinking it would be a breeze. Ha! I laugh in my own general direction! Nope, I was numbed up REAL GOOD and they took a piece of tissue from the roof of my mouth and stitched it, or maybe stapled, to the thinning gum area. So anyway, I'm just un-numbing and trying to find the pain pills I just got from the local KMart pharmapalooza.. So I'm gonna have to go. Cut me some slack, bro. Adios and goodbye until next time.

Valerie Plame Is Not Too Shabby-Looking

Check this out.. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/huff-wires/20070308/cia-leak-congress Sorry, feeling a little juvenile today... A certain right-wing oriented person today told me that Valerie wasn't really a covert spy, under his definition of covert. Thus, no laws were broken and no one did anything wrong. Tell that to Valerie and her husband. So why did she have to change positions at the CIA and move from undercover to.. uh.. overcover..I guess. I hope she and Joe's civil lawsuit against those bastards outs all the snakes in that swamp.

Are More H1-B's Really The Answer?

How is it possible we need more than 65,000 immigrants to fill positions in high-tech when so many American IT people I know are out of work? Or could it be that they just don't want to pay professional wages? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/huff-wires/20070307/congress-bill-gates Uncle Lou (Dobbs) what do you think? I think immigrants were the backbone of this country and I have nothing against immigration, but do we really need to raise the limit when so many professionals have either left the IT market altogether or are going from 6-month contract to 6-month contract (without medical or any other benefits)?

"There is a cloud over the White House"

That's what special counsel Patrick Fitzgerald said on Feb.21 at the Libby trial, and he did not back away from that in front of the press today, after the GUILTY verdict of "Scooter" Libby on 4 of the 5 charges. Whether there will be further investigation and/or court proceedings, one doesn't know. But facts are facts. The White House leaked the name of ambassador Joe Wilson's wife, a covert CIA operative, to the press. And that, I believe, is a criminal offense. So let's wait and see what happens. Bottom line - our Vice President, "Dick" Cheney, has a convicted felon as a former trusted advisor. Does one bad apple spoil the whole basket, or were they all bad to begin with is the question. I have my own opinion on that. Here's some of the story here: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17485067/

Barbariffic!

Here it is for your enjoyment (must be over 18!) http://www.antonellabarbapix.com/ Apparently Antonella Barba is a contestent on American Idol, my sources tell me. Actually if MSNBC can show 3 of them on their show (over and over again) while talking about how 'shocked' people are, they can't be that bad. Better get a cup of coffee while you wait, though, the site might be a little overwhelmed right now. Disclaimer: I am not, and never have been, an American Idol viewer. I just heard the buzz. Adios and Buenos Noches.

The Vets Deserve Better

This article talks about how the VA and DOD are deliberately misrepresenting or misdiagnosing returning injured vets. http://www.militarytimes.com/news/2007/02/TNSmedholdmoney070222/ On top of the problems at Walter Reed and other institutions across the country, and the guy in charge of WR - Kiley - saying he "lived across the street" from it but didn't know what was going on.. How much more of this can we stand? What a disgrace. Every time I see some poor guy or girl on TV with a head injury or missing limb caused by this war, I get angry. Because they did not have to be there. It's the wrong war, the wrong place, the wrong time. And these young people were just doing their job and doing it bravely. And someone, in fact, lots of someones, knew about Walter Reed for 4 years before the poo hit the fan blades. So I think we need to find out just who knew and did nothing. And while you're at it, Georgie, stop paring down the budget for vets.

Screamin' Yeast!

Well I bottled my second batch of "Screamin' Yeast Raspberry Wheat" beer yesterday. 3 & 1/2 hours of fun! I call it Screamin' Yeast due to its tendency to blow up the airlock while fermenting. But it turned out well last time. This time, not so sure. I made it a different way, instead of using a couple bottles of raspberry extract, I used about 4.5 lbs of frozen berries. This beer looks quite pink and has loads of crap still in it. Very cloudy. Hope it turns out alright. Lots of money and effort went into this bad boy. Next time, I may just do a simple one. IPA or Pilsner. No more fruit for a while. In the spirit of my beer-laden post today, check out my list of favorite beers. And remember, drink responsibly. Adios amigos y amigas.

Words & Phrases That Are Dead To Me

(Apologies to Steven Colbert, and his "Dead to me" list..) There are some popular words and phrases that annoy me for whatever reason. For the most part, they are either over-used, grating, or dumb. If I was king, I would decree that they be banned. But, since this kind of conflicts with my belief in freedom of speech, let's just say I'd prefer they not ever be used again. Use some discretion, people! OK, here's my current list: 1.) "Extreme" as in "extreme soft drink!", 2.) "Cool" (I break my own rules on this a bit too but really, no one over 29 or so should use this word. ) 3.) "Cool Beans" (See #2, this is a more annoying version.) 4.) "Boo-ya!", 5.) "Hemi", 6.) "weak stream" (Oh, those prostate med commercials!), 7.) "Restless Legs Syndrome" (does this really exist or was it thought up by Big Pharma so they could sell more drugs?), 8.) "Kanye West". So if anyone agrees or disagrees with this list, or you care to add your own words, please feel free to comment. Also, if anyone really has restless legs syndrome, I apologize. Write and let me know.

The Circus Is Over

Well it appears they finally buried Anna Nicole Smith today. I have not been paying a lot of attention to the circus that was going on but it was hard not to catch bits and pieces since all of the mainstream media was abuzz about it. This is my take on the whole thing: I never was a big fan of her. I thought her reality show was hideous. And watching video of her at awards shows and whatnot, she was obviously under the influence of something and I was amused by watching her. But the thing is, I feel sorry now. I feel sorry for her, her young daughter, and any friends she may have had. Because she was a human being. She was someone's daughter and she was someone's mother. I am shocked and saddened by the utter lack of dignity and respect that our media, entertainers, her so-called friends and family and others have shown toward her after her death. Glenn Beck on CNN called her "white trash" today, the day of her funeral. And her funeral today was a circus. And the media lapped it up. And maybe America did too. It's sad. We've become a callous nation, low-class and prurient. We want to see celebrities crash and burn. We're amused by it. We don't even care if they die. We will still make fun of them. Personally, I don't talk bad about the deceased. They can't defend themself. I recommend getting on http://www.youtube.com and searching for Craig Ferguson's monologue on his personal experience with addiction and his comments on Britney Spears, it's good stuff. I don't watch his show but I heard about this clip. He seems to have his head on straight. In closing (finally Timmy will shut up!) let's treat each other better. Let's look for the positive in everyone. Don't forget we're ALL human and we ALL will die. Let's respect each other. And let's show a little respect for those that have just passed on. Because someday it will be you.

Tornado Season Starts Badly

First of all, my thoughts and prayers are with the familes that have lost loved ones in Alabama and Missouri today. This is a disturbing story. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17397486/ I am glad that we in this area were spared that. In less than 2 weeks, it will have been a year since Springfield was hit by two F2 twisters (3-12-06). That was pretty bad, but we were incredibly lucky that no one was killed that night. There were several dozen people hurt and many homes destroyed but at least we escaped fatalities. It is seriously windy here today, and I've seen that several homes east of Springfield were damaged by high winds. But I sure won't forget that night last year. My house was damaged slightly and I lost a tree, but things could have been so much worse, since I was right in the path of the first tornado. Sometimes things happen that just show you the randomness of life, how, on one day, 16 people were killed, and on another day, everyone got out safely. Life is random. You never know what tomorrow is going to bring. So don't waste a single day. Take care. Peace, Adios until next time.

Hello, Spring.. We Missed You

I guess spring is almost here, since spring training started and, lo and behold, the Cards won their first game: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17386341/ But, I have to ask, why are LaRussa and Duncan trying to ruin Wainright's career by making him a starter? Yes, they need starting pitchers, with Marquis, Weaver and Suppan all gone and Mulder on permanent gimpiness. But do they really think Isringhausen still has it in the bullpen? I hope he does, but from what I saw last season he was having some problems. Maybe the surgery will help. Also, what's the deal about trying to sign Roger Clemons? Good God, this dude should retire already. He's past his prime. And what a snarky thing for his agent to turn down all cities but Boston, New York, and... I fotget the other one.. but, really, what a tool. Sorry Cubby fans but we're going to finish ahead of you again this year! Adios and Peace.

Oh No He Di' Int!

I have become enamored of Keith Olbermann. No, not a man crush. I just like the guy. As a fellow heterosexual male. Not that there's anything wrong with any of the various other alternatives. I will brag and say I liked him even before the rest of the country discovered him. Because when it seemed like I was one of only about 5 other people in the country that could see through the lies and blunderings of our current administration, he was a shining beacon of truth. So, long story short, if possible, I recommend "Countdown" on MSNBC to all those who are tired of getting only one side of the news. Sure, he's biased, and he'll admit it. But when most of the other "news" channels are broadcasting the official white house line, he actually dares to question it. Here's a great place to start: read what he said about Condi Rice, here. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17351284/ Adios until next time.

First Post - What The Hell Am I Doing?

Well, friends, this is the virgin post on PlasticPounder. My name is Timmy. You may well ask, "Timmy, what is a plastic pounder?" and well you may. And well may you ask. Well. A plastic pounder is a code-monkey, a desk jockey, a member of the swarming masses of information technologists. Since I have quite a lot of opinions, which most (sane) people don't seem to share, I decided to do the "blog thing". And so it begins... Wish me well. Godspeed, John Glenn.